Attending school events after divorce can make you uncomfortable, especially if your former spouse will be in attendance. Although you want to be there for your children’s milestones, you probably want to avoid your ex at all costs. From softball games and ballet recitals to graduations and school conferences, school events keep both parents busy, and they don’t stop just because you’re divorced.
Continue reading to learn how you can be present for your children during this difficult time.
Prioritizing Your Children
Children crave attention, and one of the best times you can root for them is during a school event. Nothing will warm your child’s heart more than seeing you cheer them on from the sidelines. For this reason, you shouldn’t take it as a personal attack when your child invites your former spouse. Remember, these events highlight your children’s accomplishments, and they’re not about your feelings.
If you’re the custodial parent, it’s your responsibility to keep your ex updated on school events. You don’t have to meet up with them in person to discuss events, nor do you need to call them. You can simply send them a text message or send a formal invitation via e-mail. Don’t overcomplicate communication, and keep these updates short.
If you and your ex refuse to speak to each other, you can also set up a shared online calendar where you can both post important dates, times, and locations for events. Keeping a calendar leaves the ball in your ex’s court, and they can decide whether to attend or not. Moreover, they won’t be able to accuse you of keeping information from them.
Picking a Seat at School Events
Even if you and your ex are on bad terms, you must both act cordially in front of your children. Both of you must set an example for your children and everyone else’s children, and you don’t want to be the two people who ruin a school event. Teachers and other parents will remember both of you as the two people who couldn’t stop bickering at the awards ceremony.
If you both have moved on from a bitter divorce, then you might consider sitting next to each other. Children always look for their parents when they’re in front of an audience, and seeing both parents together will help alleviate performance anxiety.
However, if your ex brings their new significant other, you will want to sit in a different section. Your ex-spouse might bring their new partner to get a reaction from you, and the best move you can take is to ignore them. Although you want to be the best parent possible, you also have to look out for yourself. Calmly explain to your children that you would rather sit alone without insulting your former spouse’s new partner.
Contact The Ault Firm
If you’re still going through a divorce, school events are one of the last things you’re worried about. Divorce is a lengthy process, and no one should have to go through it alone. Contact The Ault Firm today to work with an experienced divorce attorney who will fight for you in court.