Getting to the point where you and your ex-spouse are co-parenting well is an exciting landmark. It takes a lot of hard work and respect to get there. It is a sign that you and your ex are co-parenting effectively. There may be room for improvement periodically, but take a moment to notice what is working for your family, pat yourselves on the back, and go with it.
Below are signs of effective co-parenting, indications of healthy and productive communication between you and your ex-spouse.
Your Kids Believe You Get Along
Effective co-parents’ children think that you and your ex get along famously. This does not mean it’s true; it may be true, or it may not. However, this does mean both parents show the other parent respect and communicate civilly in front of the kids.
You Comply with Boundaries
Successful co-parents have clear boundaries that both parties respect. You each understand that you cannot control the other parent. You have set rules on what is expected, what is acceptable, and, in some cases, what is not acceptable. This may include what you two can talk about with one another, how much time you can spend together, etc. Each family will have their own set of boundaries.
No Need to Manipulate Children
In unhealthy relationships between exes, children may find themselves being pitted against one parent by the other parent. In a healthy co-parenting relationship, there are no attempts to manipulate kids and that their kid’s relationship with the other parent does not take away from your relationship. Both parents understand and celebrate the fact that there is room for both parents.
You Follow a Set Schedule
Kids thrive in predictable routines. Co-parents thrive when set schedules are followed. There are no questions or uncertainties with a predetermined schedule for the parents and, most importantly, the children. Of course, things will inevitably come up that will require a change in your plan. When this happens, communication is critical for co-parenting to be successful. Be willing to be flexible, helpful, and stick to your commitments whenever possible.
You Are Respectful of One Another’s Child Time
Another trait of a healthy co-parenting relationship is that you and your ex are respectful of each other’s time with your children. You and your ex encourage relationships with the other parent and are aware and respectful of their importance in your children’s lives. While it is hard to spend time away from your kids, you and your ex see the value in spending time and nurturing the relationship with the other parent.
Time Together is Tension-Free
When you and your ex can attend family gatherings, sporting events, performances, and school functions together without feeling tension, anxiety, or animosity, you will know you two are co-parenting well. This shows you are both putting your children’s needs before your own.
Contact The Ault Firm
The professionals at The Ault Firm understand the challenges that divorce and life after divorce bring. If you are considering divorce or need legal representation to protect your family after your divorce, call us to schedule your case review today.